The Comfort Trap.....
As I write this I am getting ready to head to Colorado in anticipation of Drew’s (my husband’s) mountain bike ride. It’s not just any mountain bike ride but 100 miles up a giant mountain (at over 10,000 feet altitude). You are either reading and thinking “Wow, that’s amazing!” or the magnitude is completely lost on you and you’re more like “Oh.”
The second time I met Drew we were in a bar (shocking right!) and we were talking about things we liked to do. I listed off drinking and listening to “indie rock music” (I thought I was so cool) and he informed me that over the next weekend he was traveling to do a half ironman. I had never heard of such and couldn’t get past the fact that the guy I was interested in wore spandex biking shorts. In other words, I was in the “Oh” category.
Little did I know that the more I got to know Drew the more I would come to understand the world of competitive sports for the non professional athlete. Apparently there was training involved, a coach, a nutrition plan, and soon I realized that this was way more than a one time race and was an actual lifestyle.
In the past 10 years I have become a spectator at many of these events (and even gotten involved in some myself). He has raced in 2 Ironman competitions (140.6 miles), more than a handful of half iron mans (70.3), xterra triathlons, ultra marathons (50 miles of running), and this week he will attempt 100 miles up a giant mountain.
If you know us as a couple you’re probably used to hearing me complain more than gloat about Drew’s training. I spend most weekends alone and no matter where we are or what holiday/tradition/event/etc is happening-Drew is always out biking. I’ve paced the floor on several occasions worrying that has been hit by a car and I have picked him up off the side of the street to drop him at the ER for stitches numerous times.
Regardless of all of the complaining it is something that I deeply understand. I understand having so much drive and ambition that you will ride your bike for 12 hours straight in sleet or beating down sun while desperately thirsty and somewhat delirious. It is my absolute favorite thing about him.
He has shown me how to overcome hard times, how to fight through wanting to quit, how to manage up enough stamina for one last push. And, it’s not just him. Through his races I have learned of so many other people who are doing it too.
So many of these racers have stories of hardship, resilience, and massive change. Not a single person out there just shows up with their bike to see if they can do it. They have made a commitment to put in the time. They have sacrificed by pushing past what they want right now and what they really want out of life. All of this training of their body has strengthened their minds and these people are capable of amazingness.
Most of the time people don’t get it. They think it’s crazy, self indulgent, a waste. But, in a world where we are told to comply, be quiet, conform, and stay the path there is nothing more attractive than someone who goes gets uncomfortable. Drew knows what he wants and he won’t let anything stop him. Not mashed toes, an injured hip, a sore back, a calloused grip, or the constant eye rolls.
If you ask him how he does it he will always respond with his favorite quote “Chop Wood. Carry Water.” He has no interest in an applause or compliments. In fact, if it weren’t for this post he probably wouldn’t mention the race at all. This is about him and only him. He will compete against himself, find his areas of growth, and push through his weaknesses. He will use the knowledge he gains and apply it to every aspect of his life including us, his career, and his next challenge (whatever that may be).
Ironically the training and the race have little to do with physical fitness or the love of exercise. He doesn’t get through these races by being fit (although that helps). He gets through by having a mindset that says I will. I can. I won’t give up. The mindset you will need to get through most challenges in life.
If it weren’t for Drew’s training and drive I wouldn’t be alcohol free. I wouldn’t be writing this blog. I wouldn’t be stretching myself. I wouldn’t be going for eight different things at once, all in, and scared. I wouldn’t know anything about pushing limits or going beyond comfort. I am lucky and grateful.
Get out on that unknown road and go for it. Get to know yourself and learn the skills it takes to recover from whatever it is that’s ailing you. Maybe it’s alcohol, your job, or your relationship. Whatever it may be you won’t know what you’re capable of until you push yourself to find out.